Monday, December 22

It's A Girl!!!

I cannot believe i am typing that title again! If you follow me on instagram then you probably already know that Bayli has been positive that this baby was a girl from the very beginning. Garrison and I both were hoping for a boy, but her enthusiasm for a sister has been very easy to catch. We had our 20 week ultrasound (halfway!!) last saturday and all is looking healthy and happy with our little miss.

so here's the story of how we shared the news with our family.

In order to get our ultrasound done before christmas then there was only one time slot available... right in the middle of my families christmas party. so... i told a few lies -like how they weren't able to get us in before christmas-, and on the day of the party, we came over, helped set up, i drank my million bottles of water that they require for the ultrasound so your bladder is nice and full, hung out with the family some more, and then sneaked out of the house when no one was looking. I told my sister-in-law what we were doing so that in case they freaked out or something she could do damage control for us while we were gone. :)

at the appointment, the technician started out by looking at the placenta, the baby's organs, and brain. very amazing and intriguing stuff, but not necessarily "cute." then she started looking at the baby's face, lips, and profile. during this time, even though at this point i was still hoping for a boy, for some reason when i looked at my baby's face i just couldn't help but think she was "beautiful" ...not handsome. "beautiful." which should have been my first clue. anyway, then the time finally came to find out the gender. the technician got a nice clear shot and said, see those three lines? that means... and typed on the screen "GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!" garrison and i freaked out a bit while bayli continued to play whatever game she was playing, and then we were driving home getting ready to see the family.

our family does a big white elephant exchange, so in the car, i put away the blue duck ornament, and wrapped up the pink baby duck ornament. this was going to be one of our white elephant gifts. we got to the party, apologized for being gone and then continued talking with everyone like normal. by some miracle, we broke tradition and did the gift exchange first. our little brown box, all tied up with string, was one of the few still sitting there in the pile of presents when it was my mothers turn to open a present. She grabs the box, and my heart starts to flutter. garrison reaches for his phone to start recording... then she puts down the box and starts shaking some of the others, trying to pick. my emotions are already on edge as i go from excited, to nervous, and then deflated as she set the box down, but in the end she chooses the box and starts opening. garrison pushes record. She see's the ornament and starts laughing, probably thinking "well... i guess i should have traded for the toilet paper instead" (it really was a pretty ugly duck.) then my niece ask's "what is it??" and mom shows the rest of us what she had opened. it's my sister who first says "is this an announcement?" and at her words all of those emotions start flooding out of me through my tear ducts and i start nodding my head as the entire family turns their attention from my mother, to me, at the other end of the room. my sister yells "it's a girl?!?" and rushes over to give me a hug. my father sitting on the couch just is staring at me in awe, emotional but not letting it show. and my mother keeps shaking her head in disbelief saying "really? really?" garrison starts explaining that we had just come from the ultrasound appointment. and then it all becomes a blur. everyone's laughing, and smiling, and surprised that we were able to pull it off, and that my mother of all people who happens to collect "special ornaments" from the memorable things in the year picked the box, and how now no one is allowed to steal the ugly duck from her, and proudly puts it on the center of the tree and gives me a hug.

all of the presents opened up after that seemed kind of lame.


basically, i am soooo excited for my little bayli to get a sister. sister's are the very best and i am so glad that bayli will have one close in age, just like me.

Tuesday, December 2

Thoughts.


i mentioned in my last post that everything with this pregnancy has been the opposite of what it was like when i was pregnant with bayli. the doctors and everyone always say "every pregnancy is different" but i thought that meant for each woman, not for each baby. so, after i found out we were expecting, i started noticing some of those typical pregnancy symptoms, but not typical for me, and i started getting very worried. for example, with bayli i never threw up. so when i started throwing up a few times everyday i thought "something must be wrong, i know some people say this is a normal part of pregnancy, but it's not normal for me so something must be wrong. my body must be rejecting the baby." the list goes on and on for things that were upsetting and different than my last pregnancy. but still, they were all "normal"

i know that we all follow different people on our social media accounts, but for some reason it seemed like as soon as we started trying to get pregnant, all of these bad things started happening to the pregnancies of women that i follow. miscarriages, still births, babies born with birth defects, babies dying after living only a few days or weeks, and even young children dying from sids, and other types of accidents. while there were of course the happy and healthy children born during this time, i counted them up and the negative greatly outweighed the positive on my feed.

because of these two things i really thought i was going to lose this baby. i thought that all of these women that i follow who were courageously and beautifully handling the trials that they were dealt with the hardships that come from pregnancy, i was learning and being prepared so that i would be able to do the same.

i wanted to wait until i was well into my second trimester to announce that we were pregnant because i just wanted to make sure.

so we waited.

and everything with the baby has turned out to be good so far. so we are thinking positively and it's finally starting to sink in; we are going to have this baby.

it's the weirdest thing being pregnant for the second time. i'm sure you've heard women say that "women must forget all of the pain that's associated with labor because if i had remembered, i wouldn't have gotten pregnant again." that's something i've heard multiple times from women who sit in my salon chair. while i think they are right, i've decided we forget more than just the labor pain. i always thought that all of the studying, and learning, and feelings, of being pregnant would come back to me instantly once i was pregnant again for the second time. nope. i vaguely remember the birthing class we went to, i kinda remember some of the things i studied on the internet about pregnancy, and the feeling of bayli kicking inside of me is a touch that has been forgotten for a long time now. i didn't remember how crappy i felt in the mornings as i brushed my teeth. i didn't remember how exhausted i felt after working on my feet all day, i didn't remember going so many days without caring to brush my hair or do my makeup. but the thing is, it happened. i wrote about it on the blog all those years ago. because if you had asked me just a few weeks ago i would have told you "i never experienced that". the only proof i have is my own journal/blog entries from that time 3 years ago when i was going through this same thing for the first time. but the weird thing is that it feels like i am experiencing all of these things for the very first time all over again.

which makes me sooo nervous to become a parent again. because if i thought i had forgotten about what happened with my first pregnancy, i can tell you that i know i have forgotten even more about what it is like being the parent to a newborn.

we recently started watching video's of when bayli was a baby to show her what life with a baby will be like, and to teach her that she was once a baby too. the video's have helped so much. looking back i wish i had gotten more video's of bayli during those first precious few weeks. we took tons of pictures, but hardly any videos i guess because newborns just sit there. not much action or interest for a video but still, i wish... anyway, while the purpose was to show bayli what life would be like with a newborn, the videos have helped me start to remember what life will be like with a new baby.

how tiny they are, and how long it takes them to nurse, and the gross sponges of filled breast pads, and the worrying about every little thing, and the midnight feedings, and the mustard filled diapers that leak worse than anything, and the dried scab belly button that you can't get wet, and how still you want to lay on the bed or the couch so that you don't have to move the extra sensitive area that is trying so darn hard to heal and stop bleeding. and the going to the bathroom a million times to get rid of all the fluids they pumped into you from the iv. and the "don't make me laugh, i'll tear my stitches" and the breast pump. and the swaddling, and the house decontamination a million times over, and hand sanitizer, and the doctor check ups, and the legs that won't stay put in their sleepers- somehow they always came out and were snuggled up next to her belly- and the uncontrollable flailing of their limbs, and how sometimes she would wake herself up because she hit herself. and the "i can't eat chocolate because it gives her gas" and the strict scheduling of feedings and naps and play/awake time. and the multiple tellings of little children not to touch her eyes. and how my boobs always decided to leak whenever visitors came over. and clients wanting me to come back to work to do their hair again. and the laundry. and the thousands of photos. and the crying, sometimes for no reason. and watching a lot of tv. and you hysterically crying over the silliest things as your hormones balance back out again. and the stripper boobs that are hard and huge and oh so sore. and how slippery they are in the water. and the proudest look in their grandparents eyes as they hold them for the first time. and the lullabies, and the kisses, sooo many kisses.

and then they grow up and turn three.

this life is the craziest thing. and i sure don't have it figured out. and i'm still not even sure if this baby will make it, heck, i'm still not sure bayli will make it. i'm not sure about anything. but holding on to those memories, the ones that were once forgotten, but that are slowly coming back as i experience them all over again for a second time are so wonderful. i am as nervous as sin to bring kid number two into this family. but i am also so excited to see his or her new little face and tiny wrinkly bum and to feel my heart burst as it grows to the size it needs to be in order to completely and all consumingly love my two little children.

Tuesday, November 25

Number Two


Drawing this has been so fun for Bayli and I these past few days! she did her "painting" in her coloring books or with her watercolors, while i did mine. because i'm not showing yet, i think while coloring this has been the first time that "you're going to be a big sister" has really sunk in for her. saying things like "thats me! and that's dad, and that's you..." and i ask, "and where's the new baby?" "here!" as she proudly points to my tummy or the ultrasound picture she has in her hands. so cute. 

this pregnancy has been so hard for me, i have been sooo sick, i lost 11 pounds in one month during my first trimester. we almost had to give me an iv or feeding tube. doesn't that sound fun? Garrison and my family have been the biggest support for me through all this, but each day i am feeling a little bit better now that i am in my second trimester, i am just hopeful that this trend continues and eventually i feel as good as i felt when i was pregnant with Bayli. 

basically everything about this pregnancy has been the exact opposite of when i was pregnant with Bay. which leads everyone to think that i must be pregnant with a boy this time around, which we would be so happy if we were. but, in a month we will see! I am currently 16 weeks pregnant, and due in the beginning of May. Bayli came to us three and a half weeks early because i had preeclampsia. the doctors say that it's possible but not guaranteed that this pregnancy will follow suit. basically i am just so happy and excited, and nervous, and overwhelmed, and... all of the emotions. We are so excited to see bayli play her new role as big sister even more than she is already, and so excited for all of the changes that come with a family of FOUR. (typing that was so weird. caps were necessary) anyway, thank you so much for all your support on facebook and my instagram feed. we really are so excited to embark on this new chapter of our lives! 

Friday, November 7

Bayli Moments

on sunday and monday this week for some reason i had my nice camera out and did my best to take some pictures of bayli in her "everyday" trying not to pose her or asking her to smile. she absolutely loves getting her picture taken with my phone, but i don't bring out my nice big camera often mostly because of the convenience of the phone. it's just always right there in my pocket ready to capture those moments. and also because i am afraid she will want "my turn?" and when i say "no" it will ruin the moment or something. but, i'm so grateful for these photos of my Bay and her genuine smiles and her true personality captured in much better quality. hopefully this was just the right amount of encouragement i needed to keep my DSLR ready and available more frequently.

on sunday we got all dressed up and i actually braided her hair! i am usually a fan of letting her loose curls fly free because who knows how long until she grows them out, and also because she likes it better that way anyway, but after watching me spend some time on my hair, she wanted something fancy done with her hair for church too, so she got her pigtails braided and a bow on the bottom to keep them together. although, the bow didn't last long. :) also, we were gifted that homemade skirt by an unknown person about a week ago, that cute little skirt was just hanging on our door with a homemade scarf to match when we came home one night. it is so nice and uplifting to be the recipient of random acts of kindness. it made our whole day, and bayli just loves that skirt, she asks to wear it to bed sometimes. if whoever gave it to us happens to be a reader of this blog, then thank you so much from the bottom of our hearts. :)
i seriously didn't pose her for this one. can you believe it?? she looks so old! and who taught her that pose??? #glamgirl








on monday, we spent the day naked working on potty training. we have been working on getting her to go to the bathroom "like a big girl" for months now, we feel like we have tried every possible way of potty training, but she has a unique medical problem with her urethra which has caused us to wait and try to fix the problem naturally, over time. i am trying my hardest to be patient but goodness i really hate diapers. it's crazy how many thousands of diapers one kid uses up in his/her lifetime. anyway, the solution that seems to be working for now is lots of naked time in the house or outside (but with the weather being so cold now, it's basically all indoor time for us) and getting praised highly whenever she successfully goes. she get's a "my little pony" each time she tells us before she needs to go. she's got quite the collection now. and she is so proud of each and every one of them. her little "potty ponies".







Thursday, November 6

Fledge Feet Fotographer

one of my dearest friends has started her own successful business, she is doing so well in fact that she's had to come up with some ways to lessen the load she has acquired from so much business. she and her mother came up with the design for the most awesome looking high top shoes for babies and toddlers. bayli got one of the first pairs and wore them to the ground. well, we were also the first to try out the new t-shirts that she has designed, i was lucky enough to be the photographer for bayli and her best friend eden: the beautiful blue eyed blonde who is also the daughter of the creator of the shoes, which lets you guess just how beautiful her momma is. :)

anyway, the shoot was so fun, and the t-shirts are so awesome and i just couldn't help but share some of the cute pictures!! if you'd like to purchase some t-shirts, shoes, or headbands for yourself, you can check them out on her website: fledgefeet.com












Tuesday, November 4

Birthday Boy/Camping Trip


This handsome man had his birthday a long while ago, But, due to my laziness with writing on this blog, i'm only now getting around to writing about it. We decided to go camping in our almost done camp trailer (we just have to paint the exterior) so that we could test it out, and to have a little vacation before the weather got too terrible. We decided to go to Vernal, Utah and see the dinosaur museum with Bayli. due to our truck breaking down we never got there. but it was surely an adventure! that's what birthdays are about anyway right? adventures and testing your limits? well, i guess because we FINALLY got our truck back last night after it was in the small town mechanics shop for over a month i can write about it now and not have an anxiety attack. :)

The Camping Trip From Hell
it started out with garrison planning on leaving work early so that we could get a head start, he got home around 3, then got phone call after phone call from co-workers stressing out without him, so he had to work from home in order to calm everyone's nerves and finish helping with their project, so after that and packing, and hooking up the trailer... we left late. but, the drive wasn't bad. the scenery was breathtakingly beautiful because the sun was setting as we were driving through the canyon with the changing leaves on the aspen trees. we got to a small town called Duchesne which was about 40 miles away from Vernal when Bayli started acting tired so we just pulled off into a small neighborhood of vacation homes/cabins and parked on the side of the road. luckily no one drove by us that night or we totally could have been in trouble. it was here that we celebrated Garrison's birthday, opened presents, blew out candles, that kind of thing. i surprised him by making his mother's recipe for birthday cake which luckily handled the ride perfectly and he was so surprised when we pulled it out to eat at our trailer table for our first meal. :)
then we cleaned up, put the table down and made bayli's bed. while she slept we put our headphones in and watched a movie in the dark on our bed excited for the morning when the rest of our adventure would begin. the next morning we played around for a bit, bayli found a lizard that was still too sleepy to run away from her. after breakfast we loaded everything back up and started towards Vernal.

we got to a small town called Roosevelt when the truck wouldn't shift gears. so we pulled into the mechanics shop and hoped it wouldn't cost too much or take too long to fix. he said the issue would probably be fixed within an hour or two. so we went to the town's library which was in a double wide trailer, which was next to the old library which was now their fire station. and then walked back through the town to the shop hoping for good news. well, it wasn't. the mechanic said he was going to try replacing one more part, but if that didn't work then it meant the issue was the transmission. after replacing that part failed we were informed that in order to get a new transmission it would need to be shipped from salt lake city which was a few hours away and it would need to be replaced in the morning after it had been overnight shipped. so, we ordered the transmission hoping that we would be able to finish our trip and go see the dinosaur museum the next day after the transmission had been replaced. we spent the rest of the night with our camp trailer parked in front of a church. we went to the park which was across the street (which was nice because we had to use the park's restrooms since our camp trailer doesn't have a toilet) We watched more movies and tried to not look too suspicious to all of the townsfolk that couldn't help but stare at us in our situation. camping in the middle of their town.


well, the next morning we went over to the shop to see if the transmission replacement worked, they had gotten the transmission, but apparently the one they sent was bad so, we had to have my parents come get us and tow our trailer home, by the time they got to us it was too late to finish our trip and reach vernal which was only 20 miles away, because the dinosaur museum had already closed. there were many more things that went wrong on this trip, but for the sake of not turning this into a completely negative post, we'll just leave it at that. :)

bayli was so confused, the entire weekend we had talked about going to see the dino's and how much fun it would be once we got there. and then all of a sudden we were home. no dino's.

well... fast forward 6 weeks and about 4 more bad transmissions and we finally got our truck back. garrison had to drive the 3 hours there and back in order to go pick the truck up, but oh well, hopefully this means the truck won't have any issues anymore now that we have replaced basically every part (we had to replace the engine when we were remodeling the house a year ago) i guess only time will tell. but, either way. we'll just go to the dinosaur museum that is just 15 minutes away instead next time. we have officially made a vow to avoid the town of Roosevelt at all costs. it's like our own personal kryptonite. but.... HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Tuesday, September 23

attempting to take our own family pictures. haha.

I turned 24 last month, and Garrison turned 28 this week, for his birthday we went camping and it turned into a disaster, that post is coming soon. but.... his actual birthday was awesome, it's just that im only now getting around to writing about it all cause we were still cleaning up the fall-out from the worst camping trip ever. but once again, more on that later. for now i'm just going to post a few pictures that we took during a drive along the Alpine Loop a few weeks ago. initially we intended on having a little family drive, bringing the new "gorillapod" tripod that i got for my birthday, and trying to take our own family pictures... it's okay, you can laugh. i should have known that the pictures wouldn't turn out, since when do tripods stuck in trees, short range remotes, and toddlers work together? the answer is they don't. i've learned my lesson, next time i'm just gonna hire it out like the next guy. but, here's a few of the pictures that sorta turned out. on my to-do-list for today: buy a long range camera remote. ;) i also have about 40 posts i'm writing for the blog on my to-do-list as well...

a few posts you should expect to see on the blog in the next 2 weeks:
-My Birthday
-being the photographer for "Fledge Feet" Tee's
-an updated house tour
-what the "Haggard Hammer" tab that randomly appeared on my blog is all about

Now for the pictures, wanna play a game? it's called "spot the camera remote" i bet you can see it in almost every image. :)






Thursday, September 11

"Escape"


you know every once in a while when your in your car, and everything is quiet besides the radio playing. then in a moment of clarity you hear the words to a song and they turn into a poem instead of just a beat... this happened to me a few months back when i listened to the piña colada song "Escape" by Rupert Holmes. it's a song i listened to often while growing up, my mom and dad love this song. but i had just sung along without really listening to it like i did with all the "oldies but goodies" i appreciated them for sounding different and for having a good beat, but i didn't listen to the words. i left that business for my Taylor Swift and Sara Bareilles songs. but... now that i'm turning into an "oldie but a goodie" i find myself gravitating to the songs from the 70's just like my dad.

with that said, the reason why i love this song is because it is, in a round about way, celebrating marriage! that doesn't happen in music very often, especially now a days. now granted, i know that they are both thinking they are about to commit adultery in the middle of the song, but, when it turns out that the person they are at the bar to meet is their husband/wife. then they realize that over the years there were still things they didn't know about each other, and things that they once had fallen in love with were still inside them but the monotony of life had made them subside, instead of flourishing like it was while dating a long time ago.

garrison and i have only been married for 3.5 years, and there is no way i'd consider cheating on my husband ever, but i can still relate to this song in some ways, i know that i have changed since garrison first met me, and the same goes for him. there are parts of my personality that don't get to re-surface very often because most of my day is spent being a mother and housekeeper instead of my main job being a girlfriend to my future husband like it was while we were dating and engaged. anyway, i would just really recommend listening to the words of this song, i'm sure you've heard it before, but every once in a while it's nice to have a good clean refresher course on why i love my husband, and why he fell in love with me, and why it is still fun getting to know him as he and his personality evolve, and this song does that for me.

here's the link to my favorite version of the song on youtube.

"Escape (The Piña Colada Song)"

I was tired of my lady, we'd been together too long
Like a worn out recording of a favorite song
So while she lay there sleepin' I read the paper in bed
And in the personal columns, there was this letter I read

If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain
If you're not into yoga, if you have half a brain
If you like making love at midnight in the dunes of the cape
Then I'm the love that you've looked for, write to me and escape

I didn't think about my lady, I know that sounds kind of mean
But me and my old lady had fallen into the same old dull routine
So I wrote to the paper, took out a personal ad
And though I'm nobody's poet, I thought it wasn't half bad

Yes, I like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain
I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne
I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon and cut through all this red tape
At a bar called O'Malley's where we'll plan our escape

So I waited with high hopes and she walked in the place
I knew her smile in an instant, I knew the curve of her face
It was my own lovely lady and she said, "Aw, it's you."
Then we laughed for a moment and I said, "I never knew."

That you like piña coladas and gettin' caught in the rain
And the feel of the ocean and the taste of champagne
If you like making love at midnight in the dunes on the cape
You're the lady I've looked for, come with me and escape

If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain
If you're not into yoga, if you have half a brain
If you like making love at midnight in the dunes on the cape
Then I'm the love that you've looked for, write to me and escape

Yes I like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain
I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne
I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon and cut through all this red tape

Tuesday, September 9

Fall Capsule Wardrobe

have you heard of the new trend "capsule wardrobe"? it's a similar concept to the french wardrobe philosophy, and has also been called 333. but my favorite blogger on this subject is caroline at un-fancy here's my take on things:

slimming down your closet to around 40 items, and changing up those 40 items each season.
these items include: shoes, shirts, jackets, sweaters, pants, shorts, leggings, dresses, skirts, vests and cardigans.
this list does not include: purses, jewelry, scarves, swimsuits, work out clothes, pajamas, heavy coats, hats and underwear.
these 40 pieces should be things that you LOVE. things that make you look great and feel comfortable, things that are made from quality materials that are durable, things that coordinate well together and have a similar color scheme, and lastly, things that express your personal style easily and effectively.

doesn't that just sound wonderful?

so to start this seemingly daunting project you take everything out of your closet and throw it on the bed. then without thinking too much about seasons, you start sorting. i made three piles: LOVE and would wear it right now and look pretty, hasn't been worn in forever and will be given to goodwill, and the maybe/storage pile. that pile consisted of clothes that i liked the pattern/shape/idea but it just didn't fit me right at the moment, ie: fat shirts, or too skinny jeans. it also was for the items that i hadn't worn in forever but couldn't fathom giving away because it cost too much money, or held sentimental value. and finally it was for the items that fit me well but weren't a true reflection of my personal style. ie: a neon shirt when i usually wear neutrals. then once things are sorted, you either have to do one of two things, if your LOVE pile is very slim, you need to start creating a shopping list, and finding things in your "maybe" pile to use in the meantime. and if your LOVE pile is large you start sorting by season and create your capsules.

this is my first season attempting something like this but i am already so excited and from coming up with my 40 items i have already begun to see how much simpler and better my life will be because of it, there is just so much more creativity and less stress involved with getting ready in the mornings! anyway, as a way to keep myself going steady on this new way of dressing, i might be posting outfits to the blog, when i think about it as a project for the blog instead of just a project for my life it somehow gets done more effectively. so, hopefully it continues to go as i hope it will, and maybe you will want to follow suit. basically, it is just giving me more opportunities for taking and posting selfies, which will probably make all of you unfollow me right this moment, but oh well. i already have so many tips and tricks i've learned in the past few weeks of coming up with my capsule, be prepared for those as i post pictures of the different outfits i come up with!

oh and before i forget! here's my items a little more close up and organized!

Shirts, Button-ups, and Dresses

Vests, Jackets, Blazers and Cardigans

Skirts, Leggings, and Pants

Heels, Sandals, Flats, and Boots